Dating a Widow: Red Flags and Other Important Things to Know

No one is protected from losing a partner. Dating a widow happens as often as dating a divorced or separated person. Unfortunately, people experience partner losses and they have to start a new life after that again. You are not protected from falling in love with a widow either and never know who you meet. 

Dating a widow is not much different from seeing other people. “You will face a lot of new challenges when dating a widower, so patience is what you need right now”. (Source: ). Yes, some situations and behaviors might require special attention and tolerance but it doesn’t mean you cannot date a widow. Below, you will find the most obvious dating a widow red flags and crucial things to take into consideration when you start a relationship with a widow. If you learn some simple rules, you will hardly experience any difficulties in these relationships.

What to Consider When Dating a Widow

If it happened in your life that you met someone who experienced the loss of her spouse, you should be prepared. The aim is not to scare you completely and convince you that dating a widow is a problem. Not at all, it is not an issue when you know some nuances because such people sometimes struggle with building a new relationship.

However, you need to realize that there are certain dating a widow red flags:

  • Her deceased spouse will always be a part of her life (no need to be offended when seeing his photos at her place or on her phone);
  • She needs time to forget about her loss and recover;
  • You need to be patient and not get mad because of her past experience;
  • If she has children, you should by no means try to substitute their father. 

Most Common Red Flags When Dating a Widow

dating a widow red flags 2

Although all the things listed above are quite normal, you still should be concerned about dating a widow red flags. If you notice some of the behaviors below, it might be better to talk to your new date and in some cases, it is reasonable to end this relationship. 

She Keeps Comparing You to Her Late Spouse Non-stop

Comparing our new dates to our late or ex-spouses is absolutely normal unless we are not doing it all the time and our new dates are not aware of that. If you hear her talking about her deceased husband non-stop, this is already a red flag. Your girlfriend should realize that this might hurt you and that you are not excited to hear about him all the time.

However, if she keeps telling you “My husband used to do so…” or “My spouse would never do that”, etc., you should probably run away as this is another dating a widow red flags. In this case, you are completely underestimated and your girlfriend lets you know that you will never be as important as her late spouse. This will hardly change some day and you are disrespected. Such a relationship has no future most likely.

She Will Never Love Anyone as Much as Her Late Husband

One more dating a widow red flags is that your new date keeps telling you how much she loved her deceased spouse, how great he was, and that she will never be able to love anyone as much as she loved him. This is rather a mental issue than a red flag and you will hardly be able to ever improve this condition. You face direct disrespect and should not handle it.

Loving your late husband and feeling that he was the love of your life is absolutely normal. However, telling this to your new dates is not normal and it must concern you at once. Never try to compete with her late husband. If she told you something like that, there is almost  zero chance that this will change in the future. It is better to leave her with her love and keep looking for another person, so never ignore this dating a widow red flags.

She Suffers Emotional Wings

Please realize that being not emotionally stable is normal when it comes to the loss of your partner. It is normal to burst into tears at times and feel sorrow for some time. This is normal shortly after her loss though. If time passes and she starts a new relationship but still keeps having those emotional wings, bursting into tears or hysterics at times, these are extremely suspicious dating a widow red flags and such behavioral patterns are not normal.

You need to be careful with such behavior and understand that some things cannot be changed and will never be changed. It is sometimes better to just quit and move forward than try to improve something or change another person. Initially, you need to choose a partner who suits you instead of trying to change her. 

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